Hey guys!

I’m starting this blog post early-ish in the day at 9:52 AM, yay! It’s nice to get my thoughts out early in the day when I’m the freshest and I can tell you about my day before. I CAN’T BELIEVE tomorrow is going to be my last blog post in my 30 day challenge! Tomorrow will be a summary of the things I’ve learned while doing this 30 day challenge, how it’s changed my business, reasons why I did it, how I’ve changed and grown in this 30 days, what types of blog posts attracted the most readers, etc!

The photo that’s on the cover of this post was sent to me by my customer, who feels like a friend now, Lyla. We’ve been working together for about a month now on her custom piece. I feel we’re on the same wavelength. I love seeing quotes that make you feel like you’re understood. Thank you Lyla for sending me this!

Yesterday was another day of taking care of little Maverick across the street, the sweet English bulldog that belongs to my neighbor. I’ve talked about him quite a bit throughout this journey, he’s like my 3rd son, haha. Just love him to bits!

We are free for the foreseeable future from puppy sitting duties but will gladly help them out anytime they need us again which I’m sure will be soon.

Earlier in the week, I had dreamt of a really relaxing birthday weekend of seriously just chilling and vegging out at home and staying away from the cold. It ended up being that we saw my family because my brother and his wife and daughter were coming down to visit, and then went to Steve’s family’s house last night for a joint bday supper between me and my father in law. To be honest, a few days before it all, I was going into the weekend feeling a little bit stressed because it’s not how I envisioned my birthday weekend to be.

My birthday weekend kind of felt like it wasn’t mine, and more like obligations that took over what I thought was supposed to be what I thought was going to be my choice in what I wanted to do. I calmly thought about it all, and let it go. This is life. Life is messy. Life is sometimes not how you had planned in your mind and it turns out to be just fine after it’s done. I was so thankful and grateful to spend time with my loved ones who spoiled me and treated me with kindness on a day that no one knew I struggled with. Yesterday my mother in law created SO much delicious gluten free vegan food, and gifted me a special necklace and earrings from my maker friend Kia Rae Jewellery. I love Steve’s family, they feel like my own!

In the past, I’ve taken my birthday too seriously, trying to plan or have things be *just so* in fear that someone would come ruin it, because many of my birthdays have been spent where someone has done something hurtful to me to ruin it. It’s how I feel about birthdays and Christmas, to be honest, so whenever November and December come around, I start to feel really contracted and naturally, just expect bad things to happen to me, because that’s what my subconscious believes to be true.

This was the first year I’m really digging deep as to why I feel this way because I don’t want every year to feel this way. I want to enjoy my birthday and Christmas like everybody else. Hey, even if I don’t have as much passion for them as others, I’d like to not dread them anymore.

I went to Body Talk a couple of months ago and had a couple of treatments. It’s been LIFE CHANGING you guys. Body Talk is like Reiki, if you’ve ever heard of it. It’s been so therapeutic because I believe I have a lot of trauma that I bottle up inside of me. I think everyone does. I’m not special and my trauma is no different than yours. I’m just dealing with it now, and it’s so messy but so great to just handle it.

The last time I went in, I had extreme hip paint on my right side, almost like it was numb but also aching for a whole month. I was limping around, I felt like Frankenstein. The biggest themes of my life that came out of that session and why my hip was in pain was because Erin (the body talk practitioner) who owns Body Mind Wellness in Warman has shown me is that I set my bar extremely low, because I’m always disappointed in others or just opportunities that I can be excited about. If I have it low, I expect nothing, and no one can hurt me. If I have my bar set high and get completely blindsided and crushed when things don’t work out, that’s the absolute worst thing that can happen to me, so I just don’t do it. I don’t put myself out there as much as I potentially could because I hate being blindsided. So I lean more on my left side as a “protective stance” from being hurt and disappointed.

Erin explained the way I feel like going into a test with complete excitement and confidence, only to get your marks back and have failed and be blindsided. Where my comfort zone is, is to study my butt off (aka WORK), expect to fail, and be happily surprised if I get a good mark. Yep. That is me. Does this sound like you too? I talked to my good friend Kirsten about it and she said she totally sees that I do that and that I always expect the worst and prepare for when the worst does/will happen. And that she always expects the best outcomes but then gets completely blindsided when things are problematic. Haha. We’re all just a bit crazy aren’t we?! I know I am…

That session healed my hip about 90%. I left there feeling totally normal. Since that session about 2 months ago, it’s somewhat come back just very faintly, and I notice it’s at times when I’m feeling a bit stressed out. Funny how that happens. Call it crazy as you will, and even if it was my mind playing tricks on me believing it to be true and to be healed, I wouldn’t have been able to do it on my own. I consider myself healed by her.

I’ve been working through a lot of things from Body Talk, it’s been tough. But it’s really opened my eyes as to the self-sabotage I do to myself on a regular basis and just expecting the worst from everyone and everything. It’s helped my marriage when we were a little blah for a while there. It’s helped me to be more hopeful about the future and feeling like amazing things CAN happen to me. It’s taught me to let things just *be* and that I don’t have to control everything for fear that someone will disappoint me and ruin everything.

Because of all of this work I’m doing, I recognize what I’m doing so quickly and I snap out of it so fast. I’m SO happy that Trish across the street told me about this amazing practicioner because it’s totally helped me realise why I am the way I am. I’ve been bragging her up to friends so much, I’ve already referred 3 people who have gone to her and said it’s been life changing for them too.

I can’t even explain really what Body Talk is, but if you go to Erin’s site here, you can see how she explains it. It’s really cool you guys, and if you have any questions about it, let me know.

OH OH OH. This is so interesting about another thing that came up with Body Talk. The first session I went to was about how I was feeling SO FRAZZLED and stressed out this summer from work. She told me my brain was going into overdrive trying to balance out my business mind from my creative mind, because I’m a creative, whimsical person at heart. My business woman side of me was controlling me this summer to GO, GO, GO, until I got completely burnt out. I wasn’t listening to my creative side of myself as much as I should have. The creative side likes to create wacky things most people don’t like but the small chunk of people who gets it, love it.

Well, I’ve been listening a lot more to that side. I’ve been more balanced, so to speak. Yesterday, I created something from my creative, whimsical side of me. I listened to my intuition and I drew inspiration from the Pacific Coast Highway sunrise/sunset. It felt so good for my soul. It was much needed to CREATE, rather than to worry about who would want it for their house or it won’t match most people’s décor etc etc etc. Like I said a few posts back when I said I was going to use this color, I really don’t care if it’s not well received. I did this from a place of passion and true love, not from my business side of my brain. I felt in my element and I was so dang happy to create this piece of functional art. Here’s a sneak peek!

In the last little bit, I feel like I’ve been having a lot of people tire kicking me in business, asking a million questions about things for sale or my services I provide and once I’ve invested so much time answering lots of questions, even though SO MUCH of the information can be found on my website, they just don’t respond. They seem and tell me they’re so interested, but then they just go away.  The business woman in me wants to follow up and say “Hey! Hey you! So what do you think? What do you figure? Is it going to work?” – even just to have an answer for myself so I can peacefully move on. I hate when things aren’t dealt with. It feels icky to not have closure to a business conversation.

The level headed, intuitive side of me (which is the one I’m choosing to listen to more lately) has this quote in my head “Not responding is a response”. If someone wants something as passionately as you do, nothing will stop them.

I’ve had people message me, and I KNOW in my bones when they’re the right fit. When they want something, they have it NOW. They book NOW. They have already researched you and YOU are the one for them. They don’t think about it, they don’t mull it over. They see the value in this and it/the service you provide has to be theirs. People who hum and haw about things are not usually the people I like to work with.

Is that too sassy? Sorry, not sorry. I know if you’re reading this and invested this far into this blog post journey, I know you’re probably a lot like me – intuitive and take signs from the universe or whatever it is you believe in, so all of this makes complete sense to you in your life as well.

Did this blog post resonate with you? This one went down so deep. Almost uncomfortable for me because this kind of stuff is a bit humiliating to me, to share my soul so much for fear that you may stop liking me, and JUDGE me. It is what it is. If it’s not for you, that’s okay. If it is, I’m happy you’re here! I hope that if you saw a part of me in YOU, that you dig deep and try and work on the things holding you back, because no one else is responsible for you except for YOU. Let’s all be kinder, happier, and more respectful humans.

On my Tequila Sunrise cabinet high, talk to you tomorrow for DAY 30!